I’m not a film fan. When I open a streaming app, I take a lot of time to decide what I want to look at and lose interest in looking at something at all. However, when I saw that Paradha was available, I immediately clicked on it. I was excited to see how the film, which is praised as the advocate of the strengthening of women and feminism, deals with these topics. One of the main characters is Amishta (AMI), played by Darshahana Rajendran, a civil engineer in Delhi. In one of the first scenes of the film, she is shown in her workplace in her element. As one of her colleagues asks her for a vacation because of menstrual complaints, Ami stares at her fatally. She refuses. She says women have to become harder and endure the pain, otherwise nobody would take them seriously. It takes some time for her “feminism” to be dismantled, and the problems with her faith are only aware of when she hits an army officer who loves make-up, jewelry and chic clothes.
post Feminism of the second waveTypical female things were increasingly considered weak. Ami’s figure in the film paradha embodies this type of attitude. It reminds me of a video that I have once seen that is about how women have to make the mistakes in the system. Women is often said that they should be stronger and accept certain things male things so that they are taken more seriously. You have to adapt to combat the system that obviously works so hard to prevent it, grow and take the same place next to the men.
Women is often said that they should be stronger and accept certain things male things so that they are taken more seriously. This advice on hardening and “masculinity” not only comes from men, but sometimes also from women. Unfortunately, this kind of internalized misogyny is too common.
This advice on hardening and “masculinity” not only comes from men, but sometimes also from women. There are differences between a “Girly Girl” and a “Tomboy”. Of course there is the ultimate stereotype of the girl who is “not like other girls”. Unfortunately, this kind of internalized misogyny is too common.
A trip to the liberation of stereotypes
As a teenager, I too was to blame for being different. Not like other girls. I hated the color pink, especially pink, simply because it was girlish. I tried to distance myself from things like make-up, which I thought was stupid. I remember exactly how I told my relatives in the eighth grade that I didn’t like to talk to the girls in my class because they only talked about shopping and lipsticks. That was not true. I lied. Today I am awe of my friends who can draw a perfect wing with an eyeliner. I walked around and told everyone who listened that girls in higher classes would only use the PT hours to gossip and not use it for sports. When I got older, I realized how wrong my opinions were. For a long time I was ashamed of my former way of thinking and refused to talk about it. I thought if I ignore it, it would disappear.
Fii
But it doesn’t. This teenager is still part of me and I have to face these perceptions directly. How do I get along as a feminist with the things I once said? I was slowly realized that the internalized misogyny and the need for confirmation were not naturally part of me. I was able to learn it later in the high school and did it too. Being a feminist does not mean being a sporty woman in T-shirts and training pants. It can be. But it can also be someone who wants to wear a flower dress and shiny lip balm. In fact, feminism can be a matter of concern for which everyone can work. I personally love flower clothing. I like to buy hair clips and like to have different colors and types of hair ties. It’s not about what you wear or what you want to look like. It’s about what they stand for.
Being a feminist does not mean being a sporty woman in T-shirts and training pants. It can be. But it can also be someone who wants to wear a flower dress and shiny lip balm. In fact, feminism can be a matter of concern for which everyone can work.
When I recognized the joy and strength of women’s friendships to be a girl, there was no back. This happened approximately at the time when I dealt with the understanding of the LGBTQIA+community in detail, and it helped me to see how closely everything was connected. As a feminist, I realized that it is not just about supporting women’s rights, but also the rights of all other minorities that are suppressed by the system. It is not easy to look back on his younger I almost seven or eight years ago and to think about this behavior. It is so much easier to delete this part and pretend that I have always represented the views that I now represent. But how should I understand why? Why do girls sometimes grow up with the belief that it is better to be a kind of woman and not another? It took a while to find answers to these questions. The patriarchy, the ceiling that suffocates to all of us, wants us not to ask these questions.
Today I am glad that I can bring up this toxic behavior when I look at it in a film. In the case of menstrual complaints, it is okay to take a break. The need to be strong arises from the need to refute the idea that it is because you are a woman and fragile when you break when you show the slightest vulnerability. Minorities suppressed by society feel the need to be strong because each individual stumbling is attributed to its entire community. But it’s okay to pause, take a deep breath and like things that you like. It is okay to have pain and use help if you need it. It’s okay to be vulnerable.
Samhita studied English at the IIT Madras last year. She likes to read and particularly likes to deal with women’s literature, also as part of her academic research. She is a big fan of sudokus, crossword puzzles and all kinds of puzzles.
