By Sonali Kukreja
It’s easy for couples living together for a long time to fall into a comfortable routine. Over time, those sweet, thoughtful gestures, like surprise notes, affectionate hugs, or even just asking, “Will you be my Valentine?” can start to fade. Life gets busy, responsibilities pile up, and before you know it, Valentine’s Day starts feeling like just another day on the calendar.
I hear many say that every day is Valentine’s Day; why is love reserved only for one day? I agree with that, but many times they are just spoken words. The love may still be there, it’s important to show it in ways that keep the spark alive.
So, what happens when Valentine’s Day stops feeling special? It might not seem like a big deal at first, but over time, one partner, often the wife, may feel a little neglected or unappreciated. Not because the love is gone, but because the expressions of love have become less visible.
If your husband doesn’t ask you anymore, “Will you be my Valentine?” or the romantic gestures have faded, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you anymore. It may just mean that he assumes you know how he feels about you. But love is not just about knowing, it is about feeling and experiencing it in tangible ways. And sometimes, it takes an effort to bring back that spark.
But you don’t have to wait for him to figure it out. If Valentine’s Day doesn’t feel special anymore, here are some easy ways to bring the spark back.
If you have noticed that romance has started to fade, don’t hesitate to let him know how you feel. It’s not about pointing fingers or complaining, it’s simply about letting him know what you need. You could say something like, “Hey, let’s bring back all that we used to do for Valentine’s Day. I miss those things we used to do for each other.” From time to time, it needs a gentle reminder to rekindle old traditions.
Instead of waiting for your partner to make the first move, why not ask, “Will you be my Valentine?” yourself? Have fun with it! Leave a sweet note, send a flirty text, or do something small but thoughtful to surprise him. Romance doesn’t have to be a big, grand gesture—sometimes, the little things make the biggest impact.
If traditional Valentine’s Day plans feel boring, create a new tradition that works for both of you. It’s all about doing something that reminds both of you of why you fell in love in the first place.
If you want more romance in your relationship, sometimes the best way to get it is to give it. Surprise your partner with something small but meaningful, maybe a heartfelt letter, his favorite treat, or a simple act of kindness that makes him feel appreciated. When you show love, you inspire love in return.
Romance is a two-way street. It might not seem fair if one person is always the one making the effort but keeping the spark alive takes teamwork and understanding. Valentine’s Day is about receiving and giving love to make you feel important and valued.
So don’t let it be just another day. Create special moments, make new memories, and show each other that love is not just about words, it’s about what you do for each other, how you celebrate it, and how you keep it alive every day.
About the Author:
Sonali is a relationship coach who shares insights from Psychology & Neuroplasticity to
help you optimize your daily life and your marriage/relationship. With the power of honest
communication, she helps you create intimate and meaningful relationships.
Using simple tools and insights, she guides her clients to break old patterns and show their
strengths, whether they are single, dating, or in a committed relationship, to create the love and
life they deserve.
She has written for ThriveGlobal, Marriage, Divorcemag & Medium.
Find her on:
Website: www.lovelifecoachxo.com
Podcast – https://podcasts.apple.com/ee/podcast/relationship-realities-exposing-the-
truths/id1746423589
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@sonalikukrejaXO
