Spanish
As told by Shannon Shelton Miller
For almost five years, indigestion was just a part of my life. Over the years, I would wake up in the middle of the night with indigestion that would cause me to vomit. Every time I ate certain foods, I got sick.
When I had an ultrasound scan in 2018, I was told I may have cellulite. At subsequent appointments, my doctors said it was possibly acid reflux, but I never felt like anything more serious was going on.
But at the beginning of 2023, my stomach and back pain was so unbearable that I had to go to the emergency room. I had been in pain for more than a month and couldn’t even get my daughter ready for school. During that emergency room visit, the doctor performed a CT scan and told me that I had a watermelon-sized tumor in my pancreas. Two weeks later I had surgery.
I learned that the tumor had been present since 2018 and was cancerous. In 2018, my doctors didn’t tell me about it even though the tumor was visible on the scan, and I later filed a medical malpractice lawsuit.
Fortunately, the cancer was stage 1 as the cancer had not spread beyond the tumor. My surgeon described it as a bang – the tumor was the outer covering and my pancreas was the gum in the middle. In order to remove the tumor, 90% of my pancreas, spleen and 29 lymph nodes also had to be removed. The lymph nodes were removed to check if cancer was found in any of them, but fortunately the cancer had not spread to my lymph nodes. I was then scheduled for chemotherapy to make sure all the cancer was gone.
When I heard the word “cancer,” so many thoughts ran through my mind. I was only 34, but I thought: This is the end of my life. These are the last moments I will spend with my children. I was in a really dark situation for a long time, but I’m so grateful that my brother, who lives about four hours away, called one day and talked to me for two hours.
“Worry about the now, don’t worry about the future,” he said. “Don’t worry about losing your hair in the future. You have hair now, so go to the mirror and do every style you can. Get a journal. Put sticky notes somewhere that will remind you of who you are. This is what you have. You will exceed this.”
Brittany’s mirror of encouragement
After I hung up and my husband got home, we went to buy some sticky notes. I wrote messages to myself on it and hung it on my bathroom mirror. Whenever I felt like giving up or needed encouragement, I would go into the bathroom and read the notes. When friends and family came over, they also left a message. Each time I went into my bathroom and saw more notes. It became my mirror of encouragement.
Soon I started saying, “I’m going to fight this.” “I’m going to win this.” “I will be there for my children.” “I’ll make the best of it.” I went to my chemo appointments like a brunch date because I never wanted to look the way I went through it.
I rang the bell on November 29, 2023 and have been cancer-free since then. Nevertheless, after the chemotherapy I was tired and mentally exhausted. I couldn’t find my new normal. It took me another year of trying to take care of myself mentally and physically.
When you go through this, you’re not really able to process what’s happening to you. I also realized that hearing about someone dying of pancreatic cancer would hit me hard. When singer D’Angelo died recently, I lost it, even more so since he was dying of pancreatic cancer.
October became a hard month for me because I saw how much attention was being paid to Breast Cancer Awareness, while in November I saw little to nothing for Pancreatic Cancer Awareness Month. I recently started therapy to get help dealing with my feelings about pancreatic cancer and life.
I now feel more gratitude for my life. I appreciate the little things that I never really did before, like getting my kids ready for school in the morning because I couldn’t do that during chemotherapy. Every morning I wake up, make myself a cup of coffee and, looking out the kitchen window, just enjoy the wind blowing through the trees, the falling leaves and the beauty of nature.
I’m happier now than ever before. I take time for myself. I make time for self-care. I spend a lot of time alone journaling, processing my feelings, and healing myself from the inside out.
2023
The night before chemotherapy started, I posted a video about my journey on TikTok. At first I didn’t think I would share it, but I wanted to spread the message: “If something feels off, get it checked out. Go to the emergency room, but don’t put it off.” The next morning, the video had 137,000 views and as many comments. My inbox exploded. Since my diagnosis, so many people from TikTok and in my city – people I didn’t even know before – have shown up for me and shown me their support.
Since then, I’ve been posting videos, from my morning routine to other aspects of my life. I didn’t want to be known as just “Cancer Girl” on TikTok, but I still want people to be aware of pancreatic cancer. If you don’t know what to look for, you may miss the symptoms. It is often recognized too late because the symptoms are common complaints such as lack of energy, bloating, back and stomach pain here and there.
If symptoms are detected early, pancreatic cancer does not have to be a death sentence. The most important thing is to advocate for yourself and not just rely on the word of a healthcare provider. Keep fighting for yourself and your family. As long as you have breath in your body, never give up on yourself.
This educational resource was created with support from Merck.
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Our “Real Women, Real Stories” are the authentic experiences of real-life women. The views, opinions and experiences shared in these stories are not endorsed by HealthyWomen and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of HealthyWomen.
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