Witnessing Julien Baker live is a transcendental experience. I have been lucky enough to witness her twice at London’s Electric Ballroom back in May 2022 and her music had been the soundtrack to some of my life’s most memorable moments – Turn Out The Lights accompanied my DIY redecoration of my very first room of one’s own. I reach for her music every time I crave something that hits me right in the heart and the gut. She also inspires a beautiful community centred around her music – which only skyrocketed since her indie super-group Boygenius stormed the world with their LP the record last year (their Gunnersbury Park show was the absolute highlight of my gig year and I was proudly sporting my Boygenius hoodie in the photo pit at EartH).
As a fan I was aware that there’s a divide between the Julien Baker fans across the pond, with a sense that the younger fans tend to lack some of the concert etiquette and I am happy to report that the London audience (as always) has been simply wonderful. The room was packed to the brim with fans old and young, parents accompanying their teenage kids and queer couples from every colour of the LGBTQIA+ rainbow (in the loos I bumped into a young fan distraught because they were stuck trying to remove a corset while their favourite song started to ring out – ‘I was right at the front and I left just before this! I need to get back to show Julien my lesbian flag!’) and when Katie Malco reminisced about opening for Julien back in 2017, there was at least one solid ‘whoop’ from the audience signifying that those who have been following her career since the beginning have become fans for life.
Speaking of supports, Katie Malco as the first opener was the perfect choice – known for her vulnerable, confessional songwriting, Malco set the tone beautifully with her self-deprecating humour and pointed lyrics. With just her and her guitars, veering between indie-folk and pop-grunge, she had the crowd in the palm of her hands. With deeply intimate lyrics tapping into emo tendencies and frankness while dealing with heavy topics like relationship to alcohol, sung with clear delivery, make Katie Malco the perfect opener and prove why Malco and Julien Baker have had a very long standing touring partnership.
Bridie Monds-Watson aka SOAK, who opened for Boygenius at Gunnersbury Park last summer, and who released a single with Katie Malco last month, was another perfect choice of support. The Northern-Irish singer-songwriter is known for sound that is much lighter in tone than the blunt quality of their lyrics. Cracking jokes about their new haircut in between deeply personal songs, SOAK captivated the audience and with EartH Hall being packed to the brim – at times you could almost hear a pin drop. Bridging the gap between fragile folk and indie-pop, SOAK delivered their signature emotive vocals and delicate guitar work. Their songs, laced with themes of vulnerability, self-discovery, and longing, resonated deeply with the packed crowd, many of whom seemed to personally relate. Tracks like ‘Blud’ and ‘Last June’ explored the complexities of identity and mental health, with Monds-Watson’s delicate delivery mirroring the fragility in their lyrics. With clear thematic overlaps between both opening acts and Julien Baker‘s work, the scene was set perfectly for the headline act.
At last, as the band was playing the instrumental ‘Over’, it was time for the inimitable Julien Baker to run onto the stage to an absolute eruption of applause and cheer. With no fanfare she launched into ‘Appointments’, replicating the opening sequence of her 2017 album Turn Out The Lights, one of my personal favourite albums of all time – and one of the kind that carry a heart break and a gut punch in one. With eyes closed, and a voice that is both strong and clear while carrying so much emotion and pain it almost crumbles under the weight of it, Julien delivered the verses
I think if I fail again
That I know you’re still listening
Maybe it’s all gonna turn out alright
And I know that it’s not, but I have to believe that it is
Baker’s trademark writing unpacks the human condition, often focusing on personal grief, faith, and self-acceptance. The set list continued with ‘Ringside’, ‘Relative Fiction’ and ‘Favour’ from the most recent album Little Oblivions, but they were punctuated by ‘Red Door’ from a 7″ single, with it’s intricate guitar work and piano and incredibly vulnerable lyrics. Witnessing Julien up close, it felt as if singing the lyrics, however personal and difficult to deliver, was almost a compulsion, as if they were being expelled from her body. There was a level of comfort and intimacy to her delivery, which made me feel like I wasn’t seeing a performance, but taking part in a deeply personal conversation. This intimacy with the audience is what makes her shows such a must see.
As the set unravelled, in between the fan favourites we were also treated to a new song, reportedly called ‘Middle Kids’, which was debuted at the beginning of this tour, as well as a 2019 single ‘Tokyo’. The audience was singing along and sharing the feelings of isolation, guilt, vulnerability, self-doubt, existential questioning and struggle with personal demons that permeate Baker’s writing.
The third act of the set tapped into the earlier material from Baker’s debut LP Sprained Ankle, with a sound a lot more minimal in comparison to the layered instrumentations of Little Oblivions, with emotions deeply raw and universal, and highlighted by the delicate instrumental arrangements. ‘Good news’ stood out, hitting with a statement so simple, yet so relatable.
When what you think of me is important
And I know it shouldn’t be so damn important
But it is to me
And I’m only ever screaming at myself in public
Heading for the cathartic finale, Turn Out The Lights songs started to build up momentum, with ‘Claws in your Back’ are being a masterclasses in a slow, delicate build up, allowing the vulnerability of the lyrics to really land with the audience before the emotive crescendo never failing to hit me right in the heart. I stood at the back, with my phone up in the air, trying to capture the magic and the poetry emanating from the stage.
‘Hardline’, the opening track from Little Oblivions, was announced as the last song but no one moved. Patience paid off as Julien Baker returned to deliver the titular ‘Turn Out The Lights’ and ‘Everybody Does’ from Sprained Ankle to close off the night in a true Julien Baker style – full of emotion, self-doubt and a matter of fact deprecation that resonates with her audience so well.
You’re gonna run, you’re gonna run
When you find out who I am
I know I’m a pile of filthy wreckage
You will wish you’d never touch
You’re gonna run
When you find out who I am
You’re gonna runYou’re gonna run
It’s alright, everybody does
Julien Baker plays at EartH Hackney until 21st November before returning to the States.
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