The push to take down would-be computerized replacements came after SAG-AFTRA leadership learned that studios took meetings with AI slop houses. A study spearheaded by women of SAG-AFTRA determined that clanker “actors” would lead to the solution to the gender pay gap. See, if all human actors were replaced by copper-veined bots, the pay gap would quickly become non-existent because there would be no more work for either gender. This inspired the men to stand in solidarity and execute this creative solution that went beyond union-backed strikes and public crash outs over losing roles to less deserving technologies and tech companies.
This effort came about when flopped actor, comedian, producer, and traitor to the craft, Eline Van der Velden, revealed that studios were quietly moving forward with AI projects, SAG-AFTRA members were quietly infiltrating tech spaces. Members have been applying for and gaining employment in various AI slop houses (aka talent agencies and production studios). Going deep into their method acting bag, actors immersed themselves in their new roles as programmers, engineers, and designers. Some served as fake job references to help undercover actors gain employment.
The covert teams have been successful at making sure AI output continues to feature uncanny valley faces, surplus fingers, and blurred and delayed mouth movements. The true heroes of the cause are the actors who sacrificed their natural faces and bodies to surgeries and procedures to spoil AI companies’ training data. SAG-AFTRA leadership saluted veteran actors who have been phoning in performances to slow the bolt crunchers’ learning curve.
BOO! IT’S HALLOWEEN
Dearest Rebelles: This news story is entirely made up. Although the creators of AI “actors” are desperately trying to make fetch happen, beloved human actors have not infiltrated these companies or found a solution to the gender pay gap. This story is our attempt at playing a Halloween gag on you, our readers. If you love Rebellious and want to support rebellions against evil tech companies and other forces that threaten feminist futures, please consider donating to our Lucky 13 campaign.
P.S.: Share this spooky tale with your actor friends and those who love the performing arts. Assure them that everyone at Rebellious is committed to only supporting projects with 100% human actors.
