This is part four of a new series called Money Vibes
Every woman has a financial story.
Some parts are empowering.
Some are complicated.
Some are painful.
And some are so deeply buried that we don’t even realize they’re shaping our behaviors, decisions, and self-worth.
But the truth is this:
You’re not just building a business.
You’re healing generations of beliefs about money.
Let’s dive into what money trauma really is, how it forms, how it shows up in your daily choices, and how you can rewrite a healthier, more empowered financial narrative starting today.
Money trauma is a lasting emotional imprint created by a financial experience that felt overwhelming, unsafe, destabilizing, or shaming.
It is NOT limited to extreme situations like bankruptcy or poverty (although those absolutely count).
Money trauma also forms through repeated or subtle experiences over time.
Examples include:
• Being told money is scarce
• Watching parents fight about finances
• Growing up with unpredictable income
• Being shamed for wanting more
• Experiencing financial betrayal
• Being taught that women shouldn’t discuss or manage money
• Living through layoffs, foreclosures, or recessions
• Being made to feel guilty for spending on yourself
• Wrestling with debt you didn’t create
• Growing up “comfortable,” but not allowed to ask for anything
Trauma isn’t defined by the event.
It’s defined by how your nervous system interpreted it.
And your money habits today?
They’re often coping mechanisms you never realized you adopted.
You may think you’re “bad with money,” “not responsible,” or “not business-minded” — but the real issue is deeper.
Women with unresolved money trauma often experience:
1. Fear of Checking Accounts
Avoiding bank apps, bills, emails, or statements because it triggers dread.
2. Undercharging or Overgiving
Subconsciously proving your “worth” by overdelivering.
3. Difficulty Saving or Holding Money
Spending quickly because having money feels unsafe or unfamiliar.
4. Panic Around Investing or Decision-Making
Delaying or outsourcing financial choices because you fear making the “wrong” one.
5. Guilt Asking for Money or Raising Prices
Feeling selfish for wanting fair compensation.
6. Sabotaging Income Goals
Making more… then having emergencies, expenses, or decisions that wipe the slate clean.
7. Attracting Financial Chaos
Constant unexpected bills, late payments, disorganized invoices, or money “disappearing.”
8. People-Pleasing With Your Finances
Discounting, giving away free work, or taking responsibility for others’ money problems.
These aren’t flaws.
They’re survival patterns.
Patterns formed when you were doing the best you could with what you knew.
Think of your life as having two voices:
The conscious voice says:
“I want abundance, overflow, and security.”
The subconscious voice (your financial nervous system) says:
“But money feels scary / overwhelming / unpredictable / unsafe.”
Guess which voice wins?
The subconscious.
Every time.
Because its job isn’t to help you grow.
Its job is to keep you safe.
Until you heal your money story, your subconscious will continue making financial decisions from old experiences that no longer serve you.
Money trauma comes from three sources:
1. What You Saw
• parents worrying about bills
• one spouse controlling all finances
• job loss or bankruptcy
• feast-or-famine cycles
• wealth used as power or manipulation
2. What You Felt
• fear
• instability
• tension
• guilt
• scarcity
• confusion
3. What You Made It Mean
This is the most important part.
Children create beliefs to make sense of adult problems.
“I’m a burden.”
“Money makes people angry.”
“It’s not safe to be successful.”
“I shouldn’t need anything.”
“Women shouldn’t handle money.”
“Wanting more makes me selfish.”
“Success comes with pain.”
These meanings become the invisible script that governs money choices for decades.
But here’s the powerful truth:
You can rewrite that script at any time.
This is not about blaming your parents, partners, or past.
It’s about understanding why your money patterns exist —
and choosing new ones with compassion rather than shame.
Healing your financial story allows you to:
• make empowered choices
• raise your prices
• talk about money without fear
• hold money without guilt
• save without shame
• invest with confidence
• build wealth peacefully
• feel safe receiving
This is what financial liberation looks like.
Here are powerful steps you can take today.
1. Tell Yourself the Truth About Your Past Experiences
Take out your journal and answer:
• What did I learn about money growing up?
• What financial experiences scared me?
• What messages did I internalize about wanting more?
• When did I feel unsafe around money?
Awareness turns pain into information.
2. Separate Your Identity From Your Story
Write this sentence:
“My money story is something I learned — not who I am.”
Read it again.
You are not your circumstances.
You are not your past.
You are not your patterns.
You are not what someone once told you.
You are the author now.
3. Re-Parent Your Financial Self
Ask:
• What did I need to hear about money as a child?
• What reassurance would have helped me?
• What guidance would have changed my confidence?
Now tell those things to yourself, in the voice of a loving mentor or mother figure.
4. Practice Safe Money Behaviors
Small, manageable steps rewire your financial nervous system:
• Look at your bank account daily — without judgment
• Celebrate holding money
• Create tiny savings wins
• Raise your price by $25
• Say “no” to a request that drains you
• Slow down before making financial decisions
• Pay yourself first
Safety grows through repetition.
5. Rewrite Your Money Narrative
Take one painful money belief and turn it into a liberating truth.
Examples:
“Money causes stress.” →
“Money gives me choices and stability.”
“Wanting more makes me selfish.” →
“Wanting more allows me to impact more.”
“Success will upset people.” →
“My success inspires other women to rise.”
6. Build a Future Your Past Never Imagined
Instead of asking:
“How do I avoid repeating the past?”
Ask:
“What would my life look like if I felt completely safe around money?”
Let the answer guide your decisions.
You don’t have to be fearless to reshape your financial life.
You just have to be willing.
Willing to look.
Willing to understand.
Willing to heal.
Willing to choose differently moving forward.
When a woman heals her money story, she doesn’t just change her bank account —
she changes her identity, her relationships, her power, her options, and her legacy.
This is the heart of the Money Vibes journey: returning to the truth that you are worthy, capable, safe, and deserving of abundance.
Every chapter from here forward is yours to write.